@postcrunk: is the ultimate american drug watching an entire season of a tv show at once or getting married so you don't have to die alone?
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@CheetoBandito77: This lady cashier asked me if I wanted it "double bagged"...I said "No, you're not THAT ugly..." And that's why I'm not allowed in Target.
@DadandBuried: My son LOVES dogs and is TERRIFIED of them. Which is EXACTLY how I feel about my WIFE.
@Brampersandon_: MOM: putting him in sports was a bad idea DAD: yup ME (in right field wearing my cup on my face): hey coach look at me I'm Bane lol