@Ristolable: "Is there really a fire? Prove it." -Mrs. Doubtfire
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@mdob11: Me: [crying so hard I can't breathe] why Waiter: [returning my plate] sorry, I thought you were done
@Sarcasticsapien: Saying "to each his own" is the best way to tell someone you respect their right to have an extremely stupid opinion.
@jazmasta: That hot guy you see on the train every day with headphones on? Imagine....imagine if he was listening to a podcast. Not so hot now is he?
@lecalabara: "I love Justin Bieber" well I love McDonalds but you dont see me making an account pretending to be a chicken nugget, do you?