@DannyDyer5: It always amuses me when I see tweets from people clearly using words they don't understand, thus making themselves look aerodynamic.
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@MattElGato: Have you found Jesus? No? Me neither. I think we lost him near the border. God, I hope he's ok. He had like all the cocaine with him.
@PFitzpa: I've got to go guys. Yesterday I bought a new shampoo that's supposed to change my life.
@Matt_The_1st: Me: yes, I'll take the free burger Cashier: sir, you have to buy one to get one Me: I only want one though, the free one
@mamatomy3: Me: There is a small tree on fire. 911: Could you describe it? Me:Picture shrubbery...now picture it engulfed in flames.