@Parker_Simpson: It concerns me when someone comes out of the bathroom stall and has to wash their hands all the way up to their elbows
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@Book_Krazy: [First Date] Me: I can't believe we're on a date! It's not cause my fathers rich is it? Him: No. He's very handsome too Me: CHECK PLEASE
@sweet_toof: Go see American Sniper. Or go to your buddy's house and watch him play Call of Duty for two hours
@shaztaberry: Daughter: dad Im a lesbian Dad: Okay its cool 2nd daughter: dad I'm a lesbian too Dad: Does ANYone in this family like guys? Son: I do
@robfee: I stopped using Hotmail, it's not for me. I'd rather have an average mail with a pleasant sense of humor and a fulfilling career.