@Cpin42: It creeps me out when my dog watches my wife and I have sex. We hide the videotapes, but he always finds them.
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@michaelianblack: Before we hang out, please be advised I will be spending the rest of the summer talking like Bane.
@007Pepe_Rex: [15 years ago] Mom: Use protection. I'm too young to be a nana [Now] M: I'll pay for the Russian mail order bride. I WANT GRANDCHILDREN!!
@IamEnidColeslaw: what did I do this weekend? saw 50 Shades Darker & coughed through the whole movie on purpose
@Wine_Honey1: These people act like they're never seen a naked store mannequin, holding a wine glass, sitting on someone's front porch before.