@Cpin42: It creeps me out when my dog watches my wife and I have sex. We hide the videotapes, but he always finds them.
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@AntoKenya: Everytime you pull the trigger a bullet loses its job...HAHAHAHA! Because it gets FIRED. HAHAHA! *I'm in tears*
@theguydf: Me: Can I buy you a drink? Girl: I don't drink. Me: Then can I just give you $7.50 to talk with me for a few minutes?
@topaz_kell: To the person who honked to get me out of my parking space faster, thank you for inspiring me to delete 3000 emails right here, right now.