@PhoenixRises69: It makes me sad that the closest I'll ever get to 'hulking out' is splitting my trousers when I bend over.
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@iwearaonesie: Me*taps wife's shoulder*Whatcha doin? wife:Meditating me*still tapping*Why? wife: It helps me relax me*still tapping* Is it working? wife:No
@withanewname: [breaking up with girlfriend via the jumbotron] "Hey, check out the scoreboard while I grab a hot dog."
@ppppolls: 30% of Republican primary voters nationally say they support bombing Agrabah. Agrabah is the country from Aladdin. #NotTheOnion