@wendchymes: It might be time to diet when you ask Siri to call your " boyfriend" and she dial's up Domino's pizza
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@TheOldFolksHome: Sue: I'm off to the hairdressers, what sort of cut would make me look beautiful? *giggles* Stan: A power cut.
@KingsnorthAP: Starbucks, where 11 members of staff frantically do things behind the counter, yet not one of these things appears to resemble a hot drink
@aguywithnolife: Not sure which is worse, the CEO of Abercrombie & Fitch saying he doesn't want ugly people wearing his clothes or that people still wear A&F
@EJGomez: satan: welcome me: this isnt so ba- satan: put these on me: are...are those jeans that didnt totally dry in the dryer satan: enjoy me: noooo