@EricMarten: It must have been really strange for Jesus to be the only white guy in the entire Middle East.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@_sanshandle: I'm not an animal expert but feeding your pet chimp Chinese food doesn't seem right. Then again, neither does owning a pet chimp.
@SirEviscerate: [Airport terminal] *waits at baggage claim area* *an entire roast pig emerges on the carousel* *I check the tag to make sure it's mine*
@nbadag: HER: [whispering seductively] tell me your wildest fantasy ME: [also whispering] owning a home