@040204Lawson: It only took four men to wallpaper my house, but I had to slice them really thin.
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@LimeyTheGreat: Went out to dinner last night & the hostess asked me "Where would you like to sit?" I replied "preferably on a seat." #accomplished
@DanMentos: [at funeral] "it was so sudden" really? "yeah right in the middle of rap battle" I thought you said he died of dysentery TERRY: That's right
@Jake_Vig: Dear President of Mexico, DO NOT fall for Trump's old trick where he mumbles "guypayingtobuildthewallsayswhat?" and you say "What?"
@sips_whiskey: If by speaking Spanish you mean speaking in English but slower and louder, then yes, I speak Spanish.