@drewjanda: It was a classic Cinderella story: I walked into strangers' houses and made women try on a shoe I found
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@crylenol: *Jesus emerges from tomb* Wow was that 3 days? Holy cow. I was marathoning The Wire. You guys seen this?
@david8hughes: [stargazing] "It's amazing the activity you can pick up with a decent telescope [lowers kaleidoscope] absolutely amazing."
@rmfnord: If I was a ghost, I'd write "Happy Birthday" in blood on your wall for your birthday, cuz you may be cursed, but it's still your birthday.
@MikeBigby: *Belle falls in love with Beast* Everyone: STOCKHOLM SYNDROME!! Called it! *Belle speaks to furniture* Everyone: this is fine