@WilliamRodgers: It would be cool if a jar of Nutella had more than one serving in it...
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@jwoodham: But, soft! What light through yonder window breaks? / Are you still on your iPhone even though you said you were going to sleep?
@mrtruthandsoul: "I think I stepped in some upchuck" What's up, Chuck? "Not much, but my name's not Chuck" *vomits*
@themorris23: In the car and passed by a cop and my 12 year old says "everyone be cool! Act normal!"nnnExpecting that Father of the Year award any day now
@squirrel74wkgn: [at the gym] Friend: This sauna is way too hot! Me: *slowly slips on jean jacket* Is it cooler now?