@AndyAsAdjective: It'll be a cold day in hell. Cloudy in purgatory, with a slight chance of rain. And clear skies up in heaven. Now over to Jim with sports.
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@fro_vo: [First Date] Me: so can I see you again? Her: I had a nice time but I don’t think so Me: *stops holding in stomach*
@CornOnTheGoblin: honey I'm home wife: how was your first night class well [hangs up suit of armor] not good
@ArfMeasures: ME [trying to convince her I care] I'm so angry the big bed cushions haven't arrived WIFE: Throw pillows M: I'm that angry Karen, I might do
@UNTRESOR: Doctors just told me I have "stripper lung" from inhaling too much brass polish & if I go back to "JIGGLERS" again I'll die.