@LostCatDog: It's a comfort knowing Dad is looking down on me, but we should probably cut his hang-glider out of that tree one of these days.
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@TattleTSister: "I don't need more than 4 hours of sleep" I say proudly while spooning dish washer detergent into my coffee.
@Rlpihl: [Family Feud] What's your answer?! *whispers into microphone* Please help me, I don't even know these people
@MarlonBrandNO: Mom: Take out the trash *I take the trash on a lovely date* Mom: Not what I meant *I assassinate the trash in an ally* Mom: Still wrong
@Gooooats: *calls wife into the bedroom* *dims the lights* *turns on Marvin Gaye* *sexily sweeps toddler's collection of trucks off the bed*