@electrolemon: "It's Adam and Eve, not Adamant Eve!" Despite his clever wordplay, Eve stands her ground. " I'm not doing butt stuff, Adam."
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@TheAlexNevil: What I Say To 7: "This is just between us" What 7 Hears: "Tell Mom everything and please embellish it to make it sound 100 times worse"
@Bagyants: When a computer program says "Not Responding" I start texting it stuff like "Who are you with?" and "Just heard our song"
@TheToddWilliams: The sentence, “The quick brown fox jumps over a lazy dog.” uses every letter of the alphabet and is also very judgmental about the dog.
@slimmy_shady: I don't want a boyfriend. Just someone to call me beautiful, love me right, and fix the clogged drain in my bathtub. Mostly the drain thing.