@HeSlimedMeRay: It's "aisle" not "isle." If someone's on the "alcohol isle" that means they're in Jamaica, not at the grocery store.
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@TheCatWhisprer: REPORTER: *asks question* POLITICIAN: that's a great question and thank you for asking it *answers a different question*
@ArfMeasures: [being chased round my house by a murderer] ME: PLEASE STOP THIS IS SENSELESS MURDERER: What? ME: [puts Fitbit on] Ok carry on
@IamEveryDayPpl: I'm sorry I whispered "a weem a way" over and over during your jungle safari slide show...
@gayIorswift13: At one of her meet and greets, Taylor Swift met a young boy who complimented her writing. He went on to say that he also wanted to be a writer, but his friends bullied him for it. Taylor made him promise to ignore them and follow his dreams. That boy’s name? William Shakespeare.