@Itskarleytime: It’s almost 2018 and laser eye surgery still doesn’t mean what I want it to
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@Ameiam: My date told me I have nice skin. It's not like he's gonna make a mask out of it right? *nervous laugh*
@Duke1173: *moonwalks into office* *draws dual finger guns* *fires off seven shots at Annie from HR* *holsters guns* *gets chosen for random drug test*
@rockymomax: Cop: You doin drugs? "No" Cop: Whatya smokin? "Pot" Cop: THATS DOING DRUGS "Ohh I thought you meant like [whispers] having sex with drugs"