@JoParkerBear: It's always uncomfortable when someone says you might be their soulmate, and you have to tell them you don't have a soul.
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@rorynotroy: if ur ever in a scary movie situation and find that the phone cords been cut just act like the phone still works thatll confuse the bad guy
@mochanya: People r afraid of boogers. I bet u could rob a bank with a booger! Folks in the bank would back up! Police would be puzzled tho: A Bogger?!
@iGreenMonk: Women always call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.
@murrman5: I got fired today "what? why?" no idea "you have no idea?" nope "I'm confused when did this happen?" between pre break break and break