@ramjitsingh_: It's bad when you accidentally tell a 9 year-old child, "Stay in drugs, don't do school" in a serious tone.
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@ChaseMit: "Can we stop for a second? I forgot everyone's names again." - me, if I was a character on Game of Thrones
@str8outaCompUSA: Jesus, don't take the wheel. Give me your keys. Sober up. *hands cup of water* DON'T TURN THAT INTO WINE AGAIN
@Rick_IZ: People who lick their fingers then page through the papers on the printer Just throw it out. I'll print it again.
@Nickadoo: On Twitter, people respect you for sharing your deepest, darkest flaws. Unless those flaws are typos, in which case, die in a fire.