@AdriannaLaCervx: It's been a tough year for gluten farmers.
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@SequelsWeWant: 2001 A Space Odyssey 2 The spaceship returns HAL is just as uncooperative as ever. He never works. He becomes the basis for Windows 10.
@peterjames48: How many raisins do I have to add to this bag of M&Ms before it qualifies as trail mix? One? I say one.
@TheGladStork: When my wife pisses me off, I get on her Pinterest and pin lots of mediocre shit, like cupcakes that just look like cupcakes.
@RealSugarFree: So far at work I've straightened a paper clip then tried bending it back to its original shape. Employee of the month right here.