@Shock_Monster: It's been clinically proven that the most effective form of birth control I can use is: "Just be myself."
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@BlindChow: [In the beginning, God created the heavens and earth...] EARTH: yo GOD: what? EARTH: send nudes GOD: *creates Adam & Eve* EARTH: nice
@jwoodham: The only way I'm coming to your wedding is if YOU get ME a gift. You just found lifelong love, I think I deserve a blender more than you do.
@leyawn: im a cat and i FREaking love turning potential energy into kinetic *pushes glass off table* your going to feed and keep me for some reason