@BallsMcBallski: It's been five minutes since Adobe asked me to install an update. I hope they didn't go out of business or something.
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@withanewname: Neighbor: It's July, you need to take down the xmas lights. Me: It's no worse than your stupid yard gnome. Neighbor: That's my wife.
@girl_a_whirl: Mr & Mrs Smith is my favorite movie about how trying to kill your spouse & demolishing your house can bring the magic back to your marriage
@CelebrityChez: Helpful tip: If you throw a baby at a tiger, I only recommend throwing a baby that you don't like.