@BallsMcBallski: It's been five minutes since Adobe asked me to install an update. I hope they didn't go out of business or something.
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@Orchidano: Big day! I've decided to forgive the woman who told me I looked tired at a party three years ago.
@LionJenkins: Me: Doctor, it hurts when I go like this. Doctor: You're not doing anything. You're just sitting there being alive. Me: Exactly.
@slimmy_shady: I hate when I give people nicknames like "stupid face" on my phone and I cant remember who the stupid face is.