@Paxochka: It's cute how alcohol comes in a paper bag so when you hit rock bottom you have something to hyperventilate into.
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@flashember: WIFE: Will he ever wake up? DOCTOR: Only a shocking truth will do it W: i sold his pet hamster ME *eyes fly open* WHERE HAS THEODORE GONE
@KentWGraham: If you wear a Bluetooth phone piece in your ear, you can say “You’re an idiot” to just about anyone you walk past.
@WilliamRodgers: Deadpool was Green Lantern Batman was Daredevil Captain America was Human Torch And we're just gonna walk around like EVERYTHING is OK???