@iscoff: It's fun to chant "Bloody Mary" three times into your car's side mirror while driving at night and watch her jog to keep up
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@sip_at_home_mom: If my toddler doesn't stay in bed this time, he's watching Game of Thrones. I don't even care that he hasn't seen the first season yet.
@man_spach: When the internet is down I turn my bed into a make-believe boat and play Life of Pi with the cat
@ruinedpicnic: "you look nice" - sweet potato "im so high" - baked potato "you suck!" - roast potato "what have I done" - guy who made talking potatoes
@Lexxivy: If your boyfriend is ever about to break up with you, yell "what about the baby!" You'll be in a relationship for at least another 5 minutes