@mattgallo123: It's funny, when I walk into a spider web I demolish his home and misplace his dinner yet I still feel like the victim.
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@SteveSuckington: "Ok, identify the noun in this sentence. Timmy is stupid." Timmy: stupid? "Exactly"
@Tommytoughstuff: [job interview] "So what would you say is your biggest weakness?" "I'm pretty bad at reading situations." *tries to kiss interviewer*
@Contwixt: Good news: It works the other way around. I entered "internal bleeding" & "unconscious" in WebMD and it said I have a stuffy nose. Phew.