@rolldiggity: It's going to be so disappointing if we ask aliens about crop circles and they're just like, "We hate corn."
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@thatstings: Since twitter, I don't go from home to car to work to car to home I go from charger to charger to charger to charger to charger
@Kyle_Raney: How to open a letter: 1. Carefully remove seal 2. Slide your finger unde--okay the seal is back GET THAT SEAL OUT OF THE ROOM NO SEALS ALLO
@Springaling85: Walking up to guys with girls with them and saying "you never called! Our son is 5 now" then walk away....always brightens my day
@mishakey: If you stop at a yellow light I'm going to assume you have something illegal in your car.