@TitaniumToplass: It's impossible to slowly tiptoe around without activating T-Rex arms.
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@envydatropic: If a gym has 75 treadmills, 1 is being used, what do you do? You go home because it's your favorite one being used Math is easy
@tastefactory: Let's ask the Ouija board a question. Is my wife's meatloaf good? *pointer moves to NO* You see, Debra? No I did not move it myself
@OldFolkProblms: Back in my day, we didn't have apps to tell everyone where we were all the time We had to actually work for it if we wanted to get murdered
@TheDailySchmuck: Top Five Creepy Things: 5) Dark and stormy nights 4) Spiders 3) Cars with eyelashes 2) Decaf drinkers 1) People who take one bite of cake