@GuyThe_Guy: It's like my teeth got in trouble in school & aren't allowed to sit together.
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@BobTheSuit: I need some sun. My legs are so white they just drove to Whole Foods in their Prius.
@GrantTanaka: Helped my son flush his betta fish today. He asked "Dad, does God love bettas?" & I said "Dunno, son, ask him after we flush you."
@weinerdog4life: I get knocked down, but I get up again, and you're never, oh you knocked me down again, you are being very rude
@vikkaroni: If you wondered if I was on the naughty list this year, I should probably tell you that the best gift I got was a packing peanut.