@__MICHAELJ0RDAN: Its like they say, don't judge a apple by its color because it might be a orange.
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@rainerfm: Little did I know the first time I bought a 3-pack of condoms that I was buying a lifetime supply.
@hollyberryness: The early bird gets the worm but the early worm gets eaten, so... I choose sleep.
@NicCageMatch: I accidentally killed another cactus & now one of my plants is trying to grow towards the phone to call 911.
@lovemydogduck: My son's method of Laundry: If it's clean it's on the floor. If it's dirty then it goes on the floor over there.