@ramenfuneral: its macaroni and cheese not macaroni and steve
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@Blondiethegood: I just threw away all the toilet paper in the office so this day is about to get interesting.
@NatetheEnigma: Nobody expects you to tweet brilliance. Just be yourself, with the occasional intent of bringing shame to your entire family.
@Brianhopecomedy: After I saw that my wife "Checked In" to the mall I called to report her credit cards stolen.