@TheMichaelRock: Amazon Prime is probably the least threatening of all the Transformers.

@ChaseMit: "Can we stop for a second? I forgot everyone's names again." - me, if I was a character on Game of Thrones

@catstronomical: Me:Come in. It's not like I'm a serial killer. Him:*laughs nervously* Me: *laughing* u have to murder more than 2 ppl for it to be serial

@CornOnTheGoblin: [purposefully keeps messing up my hot dog eating scene] director: cut! [sighs] bring in another hot dog, take 11

@bacon_gillepic: Person: you only live once Me: that is the best news I've heard all day