@Ristolable: It's not illegal to convince your child that she is the only person who can see the sun and must never talk about it.
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@runawaycupcake: "We're not buying another toy until Mommy gets laid!" might not be the most appropriate thing to yell in ToysRUs.
@GayAtHomeDad: When your kid makes a funny face, say they will stick that way, then show them the thousands of girls with duck lips on Instagram.