@TheTweetOfGod: It's not that he liked big butts; it's that he could not lie. THAT'S why Sir Mix-a-Lot deserved his knighthood.
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@tararose711: My 3yo's bedtime stories include: "Three-Hour Run-On Sentence," followed by, "Ask For a Drink 500 Times," and finally, "You Skipped a Page."
@charliedelta7: I taught my son how to spell beer so he'd stop bringing me Pepsi from the fridge.
@Brentweets: Pizza Hut is going gluten free so while you are dying from a heart attack you can atleast not have gas problems
@hansabumsadaisy: #rubbishjokes What do you call the soft tissue between a shark's teeth? The slowest swimmer.