@mdob11: 'It's ok, I'm from the internet', I whisper from under your bed as you call the police.
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@HallpassCanada: If you're a grown man walkin around with a winter hat that has animal ears I can tell that @ some point people used 2 take your lunch money
@Thynebear: "What? Only 2% Milk? Then what's the other 98%!?" [bull walking confidently out of the factory] Oh you don't wanna know
@bourgeoisalien: don't usually brag about helping people, but when I saw an old lady drop her groceries, I yelled: "lift with a straight back!" it felt good