@delusionaliam: It's okay Pluto I am not a planet either.
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@cervixsmash: Mobile tweeting with 3% battery is a lot like the band playing while the titanic sank
@ShesARealGenius: WIFE: I wish you would drop this stupid genie act HUSBAND: honey I already told you, you're out of wishes
@VikeeysSecret: If I ever get married, I'm not wearing white. Nothing to do with the whole virginity thing, and everything to do with being a sloppy eater.