@YourAnMoron: It's pretty impressive that Beethoven could play the piano considering he was a St. Bernard.
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@maurex23: Top 5 birth control methods 1. pills 2. hysterectomy 3. jean jackets 4. crocs 5. putting ketchup all over the fries instead of on the side
@JDBooie: Instead of a sock on your door, hang a doughnut. Not only is Doughnut Disturb hilarious, you provide a snack for your now homeless roommate.
@marebytes: In my opinion - until they add extra fries, a martini & a joint - they have no business calling it a Happy Meal
@GlazerBooHooHoo: To trick people into thinking I understand things at a museum I stand in front of every painting and silently count to twenty.