@Just_Lee_: It's pretty neat how owning a pool gives me an excuse to own every chemical needed to make a body completely disappear.
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@badbanana: If you're about to be turned into stone by Medusa, strike a hilarious pose and at least lighten things up for the next guy.
@HallpassCanada: Not sure if i should be proud of this or not, but our employee handbook had 37 new rules added since i started working here.
@Loli_Sug: My boss bought a breathalyzer for our office because everyone comes back from lunch drunk. My personal best is .16