@Procaffinator: Its probably time to clean the microwave when you heat coffee and it comes out smelling like a burrito.
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@simoncholland: You wouldn't believe all of the Easter eggs I just found lying in the grass outside of this preschool.
@Swishergirl24: If I tell you I can't text you because I'm driving it's only because I'm also eating.
@Kryzazy: Some people dream of doing great things with their lives, my dream is to have an alpaca named Al Pacacino.
@LuckoftheDraw86: Seriously. Who gets "regular strength" ANYTHING?! "Yeah, go ahead & gimme your middle-of-the-road shit. I'd like this headache to LINGER."