@sparklepants4: its raining men! hallelu..*thud* omg are you ok? *thud* oh sweet jesus! *thud* *thud* oh the horror! *thud* WHY GOD? WHYYYY??
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@: *Movie's 10 second sex scene begins My dad who's been missing for 12 years: hey whatcha watchin'
@spikeWilton67: Relationship Status: Got put in the friend zone by a succubus playing around on a Ouija board. I can't even get lucky in the spirit world.
@Brampersandon_: "Sir u have a hernia" "Haha c'mon doc don't u mean a HISnea?" "No I meant hern-" "Im obviously a guy. How did u even get a medical license?"