@Jez1: It's Saturday, so I'm as lazy as the guy who drew the Japanese flag.
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@ArfMeasures: [Me as a babysitter] ME: *rings the parents* We have a problem. I picked up your son David from school and he seems freaked out HER: My son is Robert ME: We have 2 problems
@shutupmikeginn: A trailer in a movie theater ended with "November 20th" and a guy loudly said, "thats my birthday" and a random guy said "happy birthday"
@CulturedRuffian: The only thing we have to fear is fear itself...& murderous clowns, & ISIS, & one of these two getting elected President after Halloween.