@jamieramone: It's the point of the night where I either keep my drunk friend from making an ass of herself or just tape it for youtube.
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@TheTimeIGotHigh: "I was so high one time, I stopped at a stop sign for 20 minutes waiting for it to turn green."
@lucidchemistry: ME: Who's my little sex kitten? HER: *slowly pushes me off bed* ME: [from floor] That's right baby.
@Tmoney68: Me: Where do you want to eat? Her: Wherever you pick is fine. Narrator: Wherever he picked was not fine.
@nerdreign: I worry that people who say "I'll sleep when I'm dead" may have missed a Science class or two.