@theDanLawler: It's weird how many of my ancestors were sepia-toned.
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@samiru27: Jane Austen really squandered the opportunity to write a sequel called "2 Proud 2 Prejudiced."
@RexHuppke: Just once I want to see a new parent post a baby photo on Facebook with the words: "Still not sure if we like it, tbh."
@AnitaHelmet: Why do fifty percent of marriages end in divorce? Well, I'm guessing it's because the other fifty percent can't afford lawyers.
@noog: Hand 2 toddlers a poisoned cookie and tell them not to eat it, then leave for a day. Some would call that stupid. The Bible calls it Genesis