@AntozWolf: Its wrong that priests have to live a life of forced celibacy . They should get married and let celibacy come upon them the usual way.
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@Brampersandon_: Today's episode of Wheel of Fortune has been cancelled because Jesus took the wheel.
@jdawsey1: NYC parks department on naked Trump statue: "NYC Parks stands firmly against any unpermitted erection in city parks, no matter how small.”
@Dutch_50: I sharpened all my kitchen knives today. Now I can't help but slice everything as if I'm in an infomercial.
@schlimp: *steals machine parts all year* *gets coal for xmas* "Santa you idiot, the parts were for a pressure chamber" *turns coal into diamond*