@skickwriter: I've already had 3 people ask if I have enough wine to last me through the hurricane. Beginning to think I may have a reputation.
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@bonniemcfarlane: My standup has no deeper message and if I find out I’m empowering anyone or anything I’ll quit.
@TheToddWilliams: [grandma's house] Little Red Riding Hood: Are you going to eat me? Wolf: I just want my hoodie back.
@sliver_of: I love how once you hit 30 every conversation can be turned into a competition for how little effort was put into pulling a muscle.