@crunchenhanced: I've been married for about 45 lbs.
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@illuminatedwndr: AA MEETING Chairman: Please, introduce yourself Eminem: Hi! My name is.. C: What? E: My name is.. C: Who? E: Hi! My name is.. C: Huh?
@Burtslorp: *Jesus looks over bill from last supper* "It looks like a fair tip would be about 30 silver." "I got this!" Judas yells, almost too quickly.
@im_not_smug: Coworker: That's a stupid song Me: Your face is stupid Coworker: Way to be mature Me: YOUR FACE IS MATURE!!