@_Enanem_: I've discovered a magical land through the back of the wardrobe, it's inhabitants are similar to my neighbours, albeit a lot more hostile.
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@Halbeerz: "So You've Been Drinking and Think You Can Dance" now that's a reality show I would watch.
@mynameisntdave: ME: [riding a horse on a carousel] weeeeee! AIRLINE SECURITY: [into radio] god dammit, he's back and he brought a horse with him this time
@better_off_dad: 16: Why do I have to go to college? Me: It’s the next big step on your journey. 16: My journey where? Me: Out of this house.
@girl_a_whirl: [ER] *covered in blood holding eyeball Name? Stacy What's wrong? *nods to eyeball Looking at the chart, rate your pain I'm the winky face