@ThePocketJustin: I've done all the cleaning and ironing but I've forgot why I broke into this house in the first place.
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@GrowlyGrego: Got the invite to your wedding. Thanks! Sadly, your blatant overuse of illegible, ornate script fonts means I don't know when or where it is
@ODeadInside: "Will someone please just help me open this window? I need to smoke!" Me, drunk on the airplane
@Lakeoconeebldr: This 5 year old is taking a call from his secret agent on a calculator and now I hate my phone.