@michael_raphone: I've got a great sense of humor *closes eyes and tilts head slightly upward* yes. there is humor nearby. 40, no, 50 yards from here
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@_wendyb07: Just some repair guys and me at work right now. If a pizza delivery guy and a director show up, I'm leaving.
@juliussharpe: With all the conflicts in the world, the board game Risk has taught me the first thing we should do is invade Australia.
@PissingLaughter: Fake moms- 'I never want to be away from my children' Real moms- 'You drop that pizza, I'll put you up for adoption'
@UrbanDouchebag: Sometimes when I'm feeling lonely, I write a letter to a prison inmate to tell them how much better my life is than theirs.