@Parkerlawyer: I've seen enough episodes of Dateline to know never to stand near a cliff while letting Hubs take my picture.
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@Donna_McCoy: The dietitian told me peanut butter is healthy if I eat it with something low-calorie, so I chose a spoon.
@schumoo: My plans for world domination will have to be put on hold while I try to open this package of batteries.
@Ideal_Victoria: *experiences all five stages of grief while the waiter walks by my table with what I thought was my dinner*
@lecalabara: Wife: I finally caught you. I could hear it from the other room. You were watching a dirty movie. Me: No. Its just womens tennis.