@SomthinBoutSara: I've stepped on a Lego before so I'm calling bullshit on Godzilla and King Kong being that difficult to take down
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@AtticusFinch79: 🎶I'm going to wash that man right out of my hair🎶 *tiny little man falls out of my hair with a gentle thud* Him: Is that a new shampoo?
@JesKeepSwimming: Sorry I can't make it to lunch today. I forgot to shorten "people" to ppl in a text this morning and now I'm totally behind schedule.
@therealeatwood: GOD: Moses!! I COMMAND YOU TO—can you take your shoes off MOSES: What? Why G: I’m trying to keep the place nice, OK? M: It’s a mountain