@SomthinBoutSara: I've stepped on a Lego before so I'm calling bullshit on Godzilla and King Kong being that difficult to take down
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@joejwest: [beach] [a foot washes up] [next, a boot] [I combine them] [more parts arrive] [I keep building] [I stand back] ME: Oh no..you?! HITLER: Yep
@Jazzzzzmina: Thank God I wasn't on twitter when I was in college. It would've taken me 65 years to get my degree.
@SirEviscerate: ME (a ghost): You know how Bill Nye used to say "don't try this at home"? Well, I did, and he kicked in the door and shot me in the face.