@RatchetAfrican: Jack the Ripper and Winnie the Pooh have the same middle name. Coincidence? I think not...
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@tdawks: The hurt I feel when someone leaves the bus seat next to mine for a newly empty one is almost exactly equal to my annoyance when they don't.
@JamieGreenlees: My GF left me because she said I lied about stupid things. I was so upset I ate a car park :(
@Cryptoterra: it says here you got fired from Olive Garden because you kept saying "pasta la vista, baby" to people. why would you put that on a resume